Seeking Desparately : Best Personal Ads

The world of personal ads is a mixed zone of warped personalities, egos, self-assurance, self-doubt, self-pity, and humor.  As previously suggested, it’s a great place to look for diamonds in the rough. 

After reading these, some of you will wonder why contact information for these people was omitted from this hub.  These ads are just some of the ones available in one tiny geographic location of the country.  It’s almost a certainty that you have something just as entertaining where you live.  

WSM - The Primitive Personal Ad

love ham. if you love ham too, call me or come by tall pines trailer park. i’m always there, eating ham in my front yard.

The Help Me I’m Lost Personal Ad

22 y.o. WSM, I don’t know what I’m looking for but I’m sure I will when I find it.  I hope you don’t suck.  No hairy people.

The I’m Having A Blonde Moment Personal Ad

40y.o. WSM, Slender blonde.  Creative, zippy, intelligent.

The No Thanks, TK Personal Ad

33 y.o WSM, Eternally optimistic, cannot tolerate morons, sarcasm is a bore.  A closed mind is a deal breaker.

MSW - The Total Control Personal Ad

Experienced master interviewing young women to be trained in the art of total submission.  I’m firm, not cruel.  A great reward is in store for the young woman willing to be completely owned.  Domination, hoods, leather, spanking, bondage, clamps, discipline, oral fixation.

MSW  The Catch Me If You Can, Or Catch Me If You’re As Old As My Daughter Personal Ad

49 y.o. I love hanging out with my friend Sally.  Well-read and educated,  two English degrees.  I live on a large cattle ranch, “The One” would enjoy moving to my ranch, five hours north of here.  If you can’t ride a mountain bike off road, driving a car over 100 mph, then you’re probably not the one.  I’m worldly, sophisticated, and way to wild for anyone near my age, so I date girls half my age.  I drive fast, I race cars and motorcycles.  I have five bikes, jet skis, a 4-wheeler, Kawasaki mule.   If you’re bootieliscious, I’m ready.

The All-American Male Personal 27 y.o.

I’m a big runner.  Wish I could say that I have proper taste in food and drink, but I’m a mac and cheese and whiskey guy so I guess I’m a cheap date.  On Sunday mornings I’m running, reading, writing, drinking.  The easiest way to my bed is a few drinks. My guiltiest pleasure is a drink soon after I wake up. 

MSM, The Art Is For Women Personal Ad -  

38 y.o. male looking for genuine man.  Very outgoing.  Proud.  Enjoy good conversation,  eloquent speaking techniques, outdoors, hiking and camping.  Enjoy the arts but still masculine.  

The Musician Without Groupies Personal Ad

30 y.o MSW.  Grew up as a street punk in the city and a country boy in the, uh, country.  Have played in indie/punk bands most of my adult life.  I’m not a typical musician, since they’re mostly jerks.   Have had committed relationships for most of the time I’ve been playing.  Guitar and amp are my most prized possessions, as I find it easier to communicate through them than through my mouth. 

The Hope For Tomorrow Personal Ad

23 y.o. tall and sexy MSW.  I like shiny things, girls, guitars and cake is good too.  I’m kinda lame.  I collect bottle caps and put them on my ceiling.  you, like, um, music.  no, more than that.  I like speaking good. 

There you have it.  A handful of reasons why the singles scene is not only amazing, but frightening as well.